Anonymous 06/20/19 (Thu) 16:00:27 No. 61
- I'm proud to be a Jew - said the wise rabbi once - if I weren't proud I still would be a Jew. Then why shouldn't I be proud at least?
Anonymous 06/20/19 (Thu) 16:11:17 No. 63
A nigger, a gypsy and a jew walks into the bar, and the bartender says: GET THE FUCK OUT
Anonymous 06/22/19 (Sat) 13:23:29 No. 81
>>61 >rabbino >less skin fix'd
Anonymous 08/21/19 (Wed) 20:41:21 No. 229
TIME TRAVELLER: What date is it?
Anonymous 08/24/19 (Sat) 16:18:20 No. 251
>>229 That's not a bad one.
The Székely gets conscripted into the navy.
- Can you swim? - asks the petty officer.
- Why? - comes the Székely back - Don't you have ships?
Bernd 02/11/20 (Tue) 18:04:19 No. 691
>>683 Most appropriate figure of speech ever. Not.
Bernd 02/11/20 (Tue) 20:42:06 No. 696
Three cannibals are having a chat:
Bernd 02/12/20 (Wed) 22:12:19 No. 702
The joke takes place in fourteenth-century Russia under Mongol occupation.
Bernd 02/12/20 (Wed) 22:14:53 No. 703
Another one;
Bernd 02/12/20 (Wed) 22:24:20 No. 704
I have a pdf with lots of these jokes, unfortunately I can't post it here
Bernd 02/13/20 (Thu) 01:33:13 No. 706
>>703 That's in the same spirit as
>>320 . There's a similar Russian joke about Jews.
Bernd 02/13/20 (Thu) 06:23:23 No. 707
>>704 Ahh, in the good old days they published joke books. "x thousand jokes" or thematic joke books. A classmate of mine had one with communist jokes.
Bernd 02/13/20 (Thu) 07:27:04 No. 709
Some Russian needs one ruble, and decides to borrow it from Jew.
Bernd 02/13/20 (Thu) 16:55:51 No. 710
>>707 Pretty shure they still make them, altough I don't think they make as many as before
Bernd 02/13/20 (Thu) 17:02:54 No. 711
>>709 Good one.
>>710 I guess. Great many books are published in general, consumerism reached the bookstores too.
Bernd 02/13/20 (Thu) 18:13:54 No. 712
Lost tourist walks up to a cop:
Bernd 02/14/20 (Fri) 00:02:21 No. 721
A [Luftwaffe] serviceman is dying in a hospital bed. Feebly he calls out to the nurse.
'Sister, tell me, who have I made this sacrifice for?'
'Why, the German people, as personified by our fuhrer!'
'Can he be here by my side in these last moments sister?'
'Well no, that's not practical, but I can place this photo of him by your bedside'.
The nurse does so, then tells the man:
'You're an airman, so you've also done this for our Reichsmarschall… I'll place his photograph on the other side of your bed!'
The dying man looks from one picture to the other, smiles, and says:
'Thank you sister. Now I can die just like Jesus!'
Found on:
https://www.feldgrau.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=59&t=31234&sid=e00b62e5a05a6cb33423c9db9a7ec2ea&start=120 Bernd 02/14/20 (Fri) 06:33:22 No. 723
WW2. One young Pole runs through the streets and young German soldier tries to catch him. Finally, Pole goes into dead end, there is nowhere to run and soldier aims his gun, preparing to shoot. But then they both hear voice of God from heaven:
Bernd 02/14/20 (Fri) 06:40:58 No. 725
>>723 And another one.
Pope dies and goes into heaven. At the gates he encounters Saint Peter and says:
- Hello. I'm the Pope, may I come in?
- What? Who?
- Hmm. The Pope, head fo Christian faith, bishop of Rome.
Peter looks surprised and doesn't gets what's happening. He comes to the God, tells about that strange visitor and asks advice.
God us also surprised and calls Jesus to come. Jesus doesn't understand what is going on and goes to talk with the Pope directly. Then he returns in 10 minutes, laughing loud:
- Hah, do you remember that fishermen club that I've founded 2000 years ago? It still exists!
Bernd 02/14/20 (Fri) 07:00:29 No. 727
>>721 Laffed out loud.
>>723 That's a good one too.
>>725 That doesn't "bite" well. Maybe it's the translation. The punchline would sound better in Hungarian (actually we have a term that would fit better instead the fishermen club).
Bernd 02/14/20 (Fri) 09:23:49 No. 728
>>727 >That doesn't "bite" well. Maybe it's the translation. The punchline would sound better in Hungarian (actually we have a term that would fit better instead the fishermen club). Yes, originally it is something like "interest group". That word typically used for kids groups, where they learn something after school, but can be used for grown ups too.
Bernd 02/14/20 (Fri) 18:33:17 No. 736
>>732 First one is about John Paul and Benedict
Bernd 02/14/20 (Fri) 18:33:28 No. 737
>>728 I thought so.
We have a derisive term which came into use from a youth novel (
Pál utcai fiúk = The Boys of Paul Street, it has a few film adaptation, most notable one from the '70s, Hungarian-American co-production), some students had a
gittegylet = "putty club" (
gitt = putty, that soft plastic stuff that holds window glasses in place, well, held, it's old technology now). They were like four, three of them were members of the board and one regular member. They took the stuff very seriously, had slogan and seal and membership card and whatever, their activities centered around a lump of putty which always had to be chewed so it won't dry out…
So these types of small time associations, with no real influence on anything is called
gittegylet , but the idiom is also used belittlingly to any organization no matter of it's power.